i just watched Star Trek Insurrection...it sucked. badly.
this is the 8th Star Trek movie i've watched that sucked. even the wrath of khan sucked. i've watched 8 Star Trek movies with hopes that one of them would be good. they weren't. i think i have 2 more Star Trek movies in my queue. i'm going to take them out.
i'm currentlyu downloading radiohead's in rainbows. i'm late i know. i didn't pay them anything. i know a lot of people paid radiohead like 5 bucks. i didn't. 0 bucks.
logan used to hate in rainbows. now he likes it. dan fisher loved it from the start and said so on his blog.
right now i'm listening to the flaming lips's yoshi battles the pink robots. i used to really like this album. now i hate it.
this radiohead album is downloading at a "zip" file. i'm not sure what that means. i think disco dave will tell me what that means. or logan.
oh look at that. it's done downloadig and now i'm listening to it. i'm listening to 15 step. it's jazzy.
tomorrow is d-structure's 1yr anniversary. i'll be there. i might do first thursday's with brandon and matthew and alli. is first thursday's tomorrow? it must be. last time i bought a neat john mckenzie for 50 bucks. now it's hanging on my wall. you should look up john mckenzie. he's great.
i'm thinking of having a glass of wine. cheap wine. maybe i'll listen to some madonna. i have this thing where i have to do stuff in order. i'm a little OCD without it being cool of pop cultural or whatever. so, right now in the order of listening to my vinyl i'm on madonna's first album. the one with lucky star on it. it sucks. lucky star is a song i sometimes play when i'm dj'ing because it gets a nice reaction. i never realized how annoying the song is though. i'm never going to play lucky star again. madonna's record is basically a bad disco record, and i love and collect good disco.
hold on, i'm going to pour myself a glass of wine...8:54pm...
8:56...i'm back.
the wine is good. it's a cheap cab sauv. the bottle has a giant red pepper on it. i wasn't planning on having anything to drink tonight but scoring a free radiohead record seems like an occasion to toast to.
i'm thinking about the next reading i'm going to host at my apartment. i'm thinking i'm going to call the reading series BOTH BOTH series. it makes sense. everything i've done in the last 4 years has been called BOTH BOTH. before it was called BOUT BOUT but that was a collabo about a dead girl in Lake Merced. it was a coronary thing so i changed it to BOTH BOTH when i moved to boulder. so i'm thinking i'd like to have maybe alli warren and michael slosek. they both have new chapbooks. i'd like to host an event/party for the release of their new chapbooks. alli's new chapbook is called no can do. i read it yesterday. it is very good. i read it in one sitting. i liked it so much i hyperlinked it as a myspace bulletin. but i did that at the end of the day so i'm thinking nobody saw it. or also i html'd the "anti symbol" which i thought maybe made it look like scary spam. so maybe you saw it but didn't click on it because you thought it was spam. it wasn't. i saw today that there is a rapper named No Can Do who won this year's scribble jam mc battle. he's down with project blowed. i'm down with project blowed. i used to buy their records.
tomorrow i won't watch zodiac because it is 3 hours long and i won't have time.
tonight on the stoop i read Liz Waldner's chapbook Call (meow press)...i liked it a lot. i met liz once when she came to the poetry center at SFSU. she was nice and tried to convince me that i should study with her at UNLV. i remember my friend trevor used to have a UNLV Starter jersey and maybe a hat when we were little kids. trevor was always sort of an asshole. he was the first kid i knew with pubic hair. he showed it to me one time all "holy crap look at this!". that was the first time i saw pubic hair outside of a magazine. it was nasty. he thought he was cool because he wore this Starter stuff but he couldn't skate for shit. and that said a lot about him to me. in my mind if you couldn't skate you weren't really worth much. and what made it evern worse is that he always had these amazing decks. like, he had a Natas board and a dopestick board and dogtown board etc. but he wasn't any good. i was very good. so whenever i think of UNLV i always think of trevor and his lousy skateboard skills. here's a poem by liz waldner
Jane Doe, A Dear
Beth, a house
a female house
Liz, a servant
in that house
E, a name
I call myself:
A,a-a-a-—
a——_____.
that's the first poem in the book and i love it.
9:07 and i'm still listening to radiohead's in rainbows and i like it so far. right now i'm listening to all i need and moving to that bass.
i sold some clothes the other day at buffalo exchange. the people working at buffalo exchange in the upper haight are extremely nice. you wouldn't really think they would be but they are. trust me. i made 25 bucks on some stuff. i sold a pair of levi's 505 size 36 that were too big for me. i sold a pair of levi's 515 size 34 that i didn't like anymore. i sold a nice black geoffrey beane button down that made the buyer smile. they bought everything from me except a navy blue airforce sweater. like something you might see in a movie wit giant elbow patches and shoulder patches and it's made out of itchy wool. but it's blue so it looks more like something you might see a member of the UN security forces wearing than a US troops. or also it looks like what Jean Claude Van Dam wore in Street Fighter The Movie.
how come everyone calls a soldier a "troops"? that doesn't really make sense to me. if anything isn't the soldier a "troop" singular.
this wine is tasting good. i think i'll go smoke on the stoop. this summer i read almost half of the books i read on my stoop drinking either beers or wine. mostly wine though. i got to know most of the people in my neighborhood that way. i live in teh lower haight on pierce street on fredrick douglas plaza. it's not really a "plaza" per se. it's one block on a steep hill. our street is tree lined and shady and clean. all my neighbors have dogs. or it seems like that. all my neighbors are alwasy walking their dogs and eventually they recognized me because i was sitting out there reading and smoking and smiling at them. so now they say hi to me and stop and chat and it feels like it is the best neighborhood in san francisco that way. my next door neighbor is named Wally. he's an old black man who has really taken a liking to me. he always says "there he is!...how's it goin'?! pretty good? nice day isn't it? okay then...see you later!" and just recently he's taken to giving me these amazing romance novels ("because i always see you reading out here i thought you'd like some more books!") aimed at the african-american market...the best one so far is about a black Nascar driver and the women in his life. Wally has given me maybe 13 of these books. if you're ever in my neighborhood (pierce st. between oak and fell) and you see an black man in a green hat wearing a flannel sitting in a little beat up honda with a pretty black lady that Wally. he never drives unless he's moving his car across the street. but he likes to sit in his car with his lady friends for hours. he seems to have plenty of lady friends.
some of my favorite books i've read on the stoop are:
bird & forest by brent cunningham
much like you shark by logan ryan smith
the singers by logan ryan smith
small town PZA by parker zane allen
musee mechanique by rodney koeneke
to set you mind at rest by heinrich heine translated by ben friedlander
pussey! by daniel clowes
the tiny #1
a poem a movie & a poem by nick moudry
and especially anna moschovakis's i have not been able to get through to everyone. i loved that book especially.
oh and CA Conrad's deviant propulsion which i read in one stoop session and got his phone number out of his book and sent him a drunken text message but the next morning i realized that the phone number was for a land line and not a cell phone.
i'm going to smoke now.
Oct 31, 2007
hey journalists, serious question...
early today i read a story about a 17 year old highschool girl from Palo Alto who in broad daylight was brutally beaten, then dragged into a car, driven to another location and raped...it lasted 90 minutes...she managed to escape and is recovering...in that earlier story they identified the assailant as a "black man in his 20's"...and now 5 hours later i read another story reported by KRON news that describes the assailant "as a man between the ages of 20 and 30 with short hair and a medium height and build. He was last seen wearing a blue hooded sweatshirt." notice what's missing? i don't get it...what the hell does "a man between the ages of 20 and 30" mean? in the initial story they reported his race, in the updated story that information (possibly the most pertinent information in my mind) is missing...what.the.fuck.? can you help me out here? why on earth would a news source leave out information that could possibly lead to an arrest? serious question...cause in my mind, it's like if the victim reported to the police "he was driving a red 96 Honda Civic" and all that is released to the public is "he was driving a car"...
and also, to all the drivers who drove right past this girl who was bleeding from the face and head screaming for help...in broad daylight...happy halloween you pieces of shit...the police want to talk to you.
and also, to all the drivers who drove right past this girl who was bleeding from the face and head screaming for help...in broad daylight...happy halloween you pieces of shit...the police want to talk to you.
...
Pinhead: everytime i do an administrative task it's a huge slap to the face of my degree...
John: i know, i just want to wear what i want and...
Pinhead: uh huh...
John: oh and wake up when i want and...
Pinhead: no, you'd still have to get up early because you'd be writing for all those people with office jobs...the world wakes up at 7am my friend.
John: oh yeah, i guess you're right...but if you write for a band, be like, a band's blogger you could just get up when you want and wear what you...
Pinhead: no no, because, you're not really in the band, you know, you're just writing about the band, like live blogging about the band for the fans...i mean, yeah you could wear what you want but you'd still have to get up at a reasonable hour...
John: i'm just not cut out for this admin crap...i'm really bad at it too...
Pinhead: me too, i'm the worst receptionist ever...i sort of just hide behind my computer screen all "what do you want?" instead of "how can i help you?" whenever someone comes in...
John: thankfully i have an office to hide in all day...you know, when i first got this job i used to try and get *out* of the office as much as possible. i'd run errends, take hikes to Sutro Tower, ride around on the N aimlessly...but now i'm like, i don't want to leave, i have no motivation to leave anymore, and when someone knocks on my door it's like a personal affront, a violation of my space, you know...i can't help it, i was thinking the other day...i came to the realization the other day that i can actually go an entire week without physically speaking to anyone...sure i'll get 35 texts in a week, 100 emails, maybe even a few voice messages, but it's entirely possible for me to go a full work week and not have any human interation...i mean, that's not good right? that's unhealthy, it feels unhealthy at least...and i consider myself a homebody...i don't really like people all that much...but it feels wrong, or post-apocalyptic or something talking to people via whatever gadget you have in your pocket, right?...or maybe it doesn't feel weird enough and that's why it's weird...
Pinhead: ...you do get chatty on the weekend?
John: well, i guess that could be part of it...cause i don't think i'm a naturally talkative person...i'm one of these people who tends to hear himself talk, and is ususally cringing the whole time but feels like he has to finish the sentence, the train of thought just to appear normal...seriously, i think half the time i'm talking i'd rather just stop mid-thought because what i'm saying really isn't all that interesting, i bore myself, or maybe "bore" is the wrong word, i don't know, i feel like i "predict" myself, i don't know how to turn that off...
Pinhead: but you're so not boring when you're threatening to tackle people...and you're always threatening to tackle people at the bar, which is predictable i guess, i guess i see your point...
John: see, i think i've done that so many times i don't even mean it anymore, it's like when i threaten to kick the shit out of Armand or whatever, it's so predictable at this point it's boing, but for some reason, when you get a little beer or vodka in my system it's like muscle memory or something...this shit just comes out of my mouth and people eat it up so it keeps coming out of my mouth ad infinitum...but i have no idea what i'm thinking while i'm saying this crap, my thoughts are all over the place, i'm a very paranoid person, but a functioning paranoid, somehow i can stand there talking all this blah blah blah making people laugh and stuff all the while i'm completely horrified on the inside...like, my brain feels like an insect's or something and i'm standing there just completely horrified trying not to let on that i know everything is buzzing, like that everyone has bad skin or dandruff or whatever and that buzzing is just scratching their faces off layer by layer...and it's all just dead skin anyways so...
Pinhead: ...so?...what are you doing for Halloween?
John: nothing, i hate SF Halloween...you?
Pinhead: same here, it's all so bridge and tunnel...predictable...
John: god we sound antsy huh?
Pinhead: go to hell...
John: haha! i get it...you too...
Oct 30, 2007
yeah?
did i just feel a pretty strong earthquake or are my neighbors hobgoblins? lasted maybe 7 seconds? yeah?
UPDATE: This was the largest quake to hit the Bay Area since the Loma Prieta quake on October 17th, 1989.
UPDATE: This was the largest quake to hit the Bay Area since the Loma Prieta quake on October 17th, 1989.
...
"I think the picture in the middle is horrible, but John Sakkis loves it, so its either keep it all, or get rid of it all."
Oct 29, 2007
Oct 26, 2007
GAME 6 (from SPT's Poet's Theatre Jamboree 2005)
GAME 6
a play by John Sakkis
directed by Kevin Killian
Characters
The SPORTSCASTER Geoffrey Dyer
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY Stephanie Young
The REV Judith Goldman
JON BON Kevin Killian
MAN in BLACK Brandon Brown
bARNONE Logan Ryan Smith
[Setting: Concord, California. Characters have gathered in a house to watch the 2002 World Series. San Francisco Giants vs. Anaheim Angels, Game 6, Seventh inning. Giants lead 5-0. A living room. Characters scattered about the stage all looking at the television.
Scene opens with The Scorpions “Send Me An Angel” playing (0:00-0:10 seconds)]
The SPORTSCASTER (from downstage). Bottom of the seventh, Giants lead the Angels 5-0, Ortiz on the mound, what a gem he’s pitched so far.
[AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY walks from stage left to stage right in front of characters holding a sign that reads “ON HAPPINESS.”]
SPORTSCASTER (as she walks across the stage). You may remember the tenth century grammarian, Aelfric, and the the form he invented, the Colloquy, just as you may remember the famous Rally Monkey, the beloved people’s mascot of the Anaheim Angels.
The REV. You’re the Jon Bon right?
JON BON (distracted). Yeah. [To the television.] Eight outs people, just eight more outs.
The REV. Jon Bon Jovi?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). I thought you lived in New Jersey.
JON BON. Nah. That Jersey thing’s just a schtick. I was born and raised here in Concord, California the (hand gestures the “quote” signal) “New Jersey” of the Bay Area.
The REV (to the tune of “Shot Through the Heart”). A wake, a bat, a vespertune
The little boy must row
To sway and paddle to the moon
Fall Classic here we go!
[The REV and MAN In BLACK (MIB) begin a “mimed” heated conversation.]
bARNONE (to himself and audience). A cold flower bursting willow before that white gurgling fish! One compartment sour, though closed for the better. To the hall, the one, the second floor up, hovering, still-sour, a foot print on the face of the room.
[Only now do we hear the heated conversation.]
The REV. Um . . . but that’s exactly what I’m talking about. I mean from red string, what that implies, to ribbon, “sugar and spice and everything nice,” to scrunchie, like . . .like . . . like . . . to . . . well, a Giants baseball cap (points at JON BON’s head). My point is, Natalie Portman might be at the game right now, or Sean Young for that matter, or Ashlee Simpson. And none of them are wearing a red ribbon!
The SPORTSCASTER. Looks like they’re pulling Russ Ortiz after giving up two consecutive singles. Boy oh boy what a night he’s had!
JON BON (more to himself or the television). You know my wife’s a martial artist. Black belt in Tai Kwon Do. She’s an A’s fan. Sometimes we have to fight over the television, you know, conflicting schedules and what not, she usually wins. I don’t really mind though, the A’s have really good commercials.
MAN in BLACK (MIB). The knot, how I see it, is as antiquated as “a red ribbon in her hair”—(pulls a red ribbon from pocket, swings it in front of The REV’s face, who is annoyed)—or for that matter, “The Thong Song.” It seems to me we’re talking about a kind of fashion, and as you know—(points at The REV’s outfit)—well actually, fashion is something that exists in the process not the product.
bARNONE. Two kinds of magic. The law of contact or contagion and the practice of similarity. Among themselves, the red crack of salt.
JON BON and The REV (together, holding hands, sung as a ballad). A wake, a bat, a vespertune
The little boy must row
To sway and paddle to the moon
Fall Classic here we go!
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY (dressed as the Anaheim Angels “Rally Monkey” walks from stage left to stage right holding a sign that reads “ON DESPAIR” while shouting). Teacher, what do you say, plowman, how do you perform your work. Plowman, dear lord, I work hard!!!
JON BON (to bARNONE). I remember watching the last episode of Family Ties a few years back, probably 11 or 12. One of those cop out finales where the family sits around the living room reminiscing about all the crazy times they’ve had, usually because someone is going to college or getting married or whatever, while the viewer has to revisit those crazy times through flashbacks to old episodes from past seasons, at least I think it was one of those episodes. Anyway, outside of that episode I only remember two others, the one where the blonde haired sister, not Justine Bateman, the ugly one, throws a weekend kegger while her parents are away, and when her parents get home, the only reason why they know anything went on is because they find an empty beer bottle behind the drapes in the living room. The third episode is when Alex’s girlfriend cheats on him with Alex’s best friend, actually come to think of it, scratch that, it was the other way around. Alex’s best friend’s girlfriend cheats on Alex’s best friend with Alex. Yeah that’s right. Out of all the half hours I spent watching that show why in the hell do you think those are the only three episodes I remember?
The SPORTSCASTER. Two men on and Scott Spiezio at the plate . . .
[The next dialogue should be read hurriedly, a flurry of one liners.]
bARNONE (excitedly). “Hermione is chaste, Polixenes blameless, Camillo a true
subject . . .”
The REV. I think I know this one!! But who said “the pun is vulgar to the vulgus?”
bARNONE. “Leontes a jealous tyrant.”
The REV (to MAN in BLACK (MIB). What’s the etymology of “hella”?
bARNONE. As if Eurobus was a sea-board and all that blood.
JON BON. Hey—Barnone. I got one. What do you call people from the Bay Area?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). Bay Areans?
JON BON. Okay so how many Bay Areans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
[All characters stop what they’re doing and turn to JON BON.]
bARNONE. Bearing the golden bough. “I can’t imagine what the Duke of Wellington would say about the music of Duke Ellington . . .”
JON BON (impishly). Well . . . how many?
ALL. “Hell’ve em.”
bARNONE. Come to think of it, dancing and laughing on the beach. The spine of the ear would snap, the sludge or anybody’s heart.
[JON BON starts walking stage left shaking his head in contemplation.]
The REV. Where you off to? This is your party. Hey, who said “the baby glove of a pharaoh can be so presented as to bring tears to the eyes”?
JON BON (to The REV). Really, you should stop. You guys heard of Steve Orth, ‘from the caves of cocaine!,’ or something like that. I swear, fucking guy thinks he’s Bruce Springsteen.
bARNONE. That even in savage bosoms, allows us to connect it to a precise modality. Beard as a mask to disguise it for Christ’s sake!
The REV. Longfellow . . . right? typical.
bARNONE (to MAN in BLACK). What about movies?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). What about them? . . . I guess I liked Return To Oz . . .
JON BON (now interested, though still watching the game). Oh yeah...with that girl from that teenage witch movie, real cat-toothed, Sabrina something right?
MIB (flatly). Fairuza Balk.
bARNONE. Cat-teeth, twin sister of Apollo, methinks I stand on thorns till I begin, in other words, all that this earth can afford.
JON BON. Fairuza Balk.
bARNONE. When in Concord I held a café door open for a woman, she passed me, turning toward me, tensed up, looked at me as if I were American.
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY (from backstage; this speech should be read simultaneously with JON BON’s on stage though in a slightly lower voice). For pony is griffin can me magi gone and past world for when mod Sefan mine new guess worse, pony is ear-lift eel gone pence, who his far-lice fleet often on, mode magi-Pegasus. Say piss miss-and-year eel ray dog-ray get him dressed and feel it; for pony no magi war-pony with where air hearse winter dale in world rice. With a seal Gepyldig, no seal no to hath car not to red-word, no to whack with a not to when-dig, no to fort not to fakin’ no to fee-fire, no nefarious Gepyldig to gone, air he gear Angel.
The SPORTSCASTER (in the middle of AELFRIC’s and JON BON’s speeches shouts loudly over both of them). Spiezio hits a home run!! Spiezio hits a home run!! An a-mazing turn of events! This is the meaning of Seventh Heaven ladies and gents! The Rally Monkey has spoken!
JON BON. You know, this all reminds me of someone. Jimmy Keys is just like Jimmy The Jeweler . . . you know . . . in Concord they got Eddie The Hat. We know all those guys. Spooky Steve, Tommy Thumbs. You know, Joey Keys. The cuteness of it is that he’s a little slow, and yet he was the bag man, or he was the guy who could pick a lock, or he was the guy that you thought was a moron. But it’s a fictional character. I was thinking of The Pope Of Greenwich Village, and we talked about the relationship between Mickey Rourke and Eric Roberts, and “Charlie, they got my thumb” you know . . . and guys like that are always in the romantic version. They’re gonna win! They’re gonna make it! And the Giants . . . the Giants are like Elton John on “Yellow Brick Road . . .”
MIB and The REV (together). In a bit hollow tears the beaker back, the tear in a shell comes out after the sun, and waking or ripping, the peal, the sun that feels its bundle wayward under sack.
bARNONE (should begin the line at “the sun that feels its bundle” in the line above). And burns what feet it finds cracking as stone and brine, and beginning to run after picking-up on the peal under that bike-trail weaving partly through the tracks.
MAN in BLACK and The REV (together; should begin the line at “and beginning to run after” in the line above). In the crab-apple some sour falling prickly stems mashed in the cracks of peal, or moths the salty wings and powder brings the red-light and bark-tree, or smoke reeling.
bARNONE (should begin the line at “powder brings the red-light” in the line above). About the wicker-webs and small window opened, or occurring in the full heel.
JON BON (to audience sung as a ballad). Buckner was a fine excuse
and through his legs went all
the Giants blew the chance to win
which way went the ball
[END.]
a play by John Sakkis
directed by Kevin Killian
Characters
The SPORTSCASTER Geoffrey Dyer
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY Stephanie Young
The REV Judith Goldman
JON BON Kevin Killian
MAN in BLACK Brandon Brown
bARNONE Logan Ryan Smith
[Setting: Concord, California. Characters have gathered in a house to watch the 2002 World Series. San Francisco Giants vs. Anaheim Angels, Game 6, Seventh inning. Giants lead 5-0. A living room. Characters scattered about the stage all looking at the television.
Scene opens with The Scorpions “Send Me An Angel” playing (0:00-0:10 seconds)]
The SPORTSCASTER (from downstage). Bottom of the seventh, Giants lead the Angels 5-0, Ortiz on the mound, what a gem he’s pitched so far.
[AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY walks from stage left to stage right in front of characters holding a sign that reads “ON HAPPINESS.”]
SPORTSCASTER (as she walks across the stage). You may remember the tenth century grammarian, Aelfric, and the the form he invented, the Colloquy, just as you may remember the famous Rally Monkey, the beloved people’s mascot of the Anaheim Angels.
The REV. You’re the Jon Bon right?
JON BON (distracted). Yeah. [To the television.] Eight outs people, just eight more outs.
The REV. Jon Bon Jovi?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). I thought you lived in New Jersey.
JON BON. Nah. That Jersey thing’s just a schtick. I was born and raised here in Concord, California the (hand gestures the “quote” signal) “New Jersey” of the Bay Area.
The REV (to the tune of “Shot Through the Heart”). A wake, a bat, a vespertune
The little boy must row
To sway and paddle to the moon
Fall Classic here we go!
[The REV and MAN In BLACK (MIB) begin a “mimed” heated conversation.]
bARNONE (to himself and audience). A cold flower bursting willow before that white gurgling fish! One compartment sour, though closed for the better. To the hall, the one, the second floor up, hovering, still-sour, a foot print on the face of the room.
[Only now do we hear the heated conversation.]
The REV. Um . . . but that’s exactly what I’m talking about. I mean from red string, what that implies, to ribbon, “sugar and spice and everything nice,” to scrunchie, like . . .like . . . like . . . to . . . well, a Giants baseball cap (points at JON BON’s head). My point is, Natalie Portman might be at the game right now, or Sean Young for that matter, or Ashlee Simpson. And none of them are wearing a red ribbon!
The SPORTSCASTER. Looks like they’re pulling Russ Ortiz after giving up two consecutive singles. Boy oh boy what a night he’s had!
JON BON (more to himself or the television). You know my wife’s a martial artist. Black belt in Tai Kwon Do. She’s an A’s fan. Sometimes we have to fight over the television, you know, conflicting schedules and what not, she usually wins. I don’t really mind though, the A’s have really good commercials.
MAN in BLACK (MIB). The knot, how I see it, is as antiquated as “a red ribbon in her hair”—(pulls a red ribbon from pocket, swings it in front of The REV’s face, who is annoyed)—or for that matter, “The Thong Song.” It seems to me we’re talking about a kind of fashion, and as you know—(points at The REV’s outfit)—well actually, fashion is something that exists in the process not the product.
bARNONE. Two kinds of magic. The law of contact or contagion and the practice of similarity. Among themselves, the red crack of salt.
JON BON and The REV (together, holding hands, sung as a ballad). A wake, a bat, a vespertune
The little boy must row
To sway and paddle to the moon
Fall Classic here we go!
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY (dressed as the Anaheim Angels “Rally Monkey” walks from stage left to stage right holding a sign that reads “ON DESPAIR” while shouting). Teacher, what do you say, plowman, how do you perform your work. Plowman, dear lord, I work hard!!!
JON BON (to bARNONE). I remember watching the last episode of Family Ties a few years back, probably 11 or 12. One of those cop out finales where the family sits around the living room reminiscing about all the crazy times they’ve had, usually because someone is going to college or getting married or whatever, while the viewer has to revisit those crazy times through flashbacks to old episodes from past seasons, at least I think it was one of those episodes. Anyway, outside of that episode I only remember two others, the one where the blonde haired sister, not Justine Bateman, the ugly one, throws a weekend kegger while her parents are away, and when her parents get home, the only reason why they know anything went on is because they find an empty beer bottle behind the drapes in the living room. The third episode is when Alex’s girlfriend cheats on him with Alex’s best friend, actually come to think of it, scratch that, it was the other way around. Alex’s best friend’s girlfriend cheats on Alex’s best friend with Alex. Yeah that’s right. Out of all the half hours I spent watching that show why in the hell do you think those are the only three episodes I remember?
The SPORTSCASTER. Two men on and Scott Spiezio at the plate . . .
[The next dialogue should be read hurriedly, a flurry of one liners.]
bARNONE (excitedly). “Hermione is chaste, Polixenes blameless, Camillo a true
subject . . .”
The REV. I think I know this one!! But who said “the pun is vulgar to the vulgus?”
bARNONE. “Leontes a jealous tyrant.”
The REV (to MAN in BLACK (MIB). What’s the etymology of “hella”?
bARNONE. As if Eurobus was a sea-board and all that blood.
JON BON. Hey—Barnone. I got one. What do you call people from the Bay Area?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). Bay Areans?
JON BON. Okay so how many Bay Areans does it take to screw in a light bulb?
[All characters stop what they’re doing and turn to JON BON.]
bARNONE. Bearing the golden bough. “I can’t imagine what the Duke of Wellington would say about the music of Duke Ellington . . .”
JON BON (impishly). Well . . . how many?
ALL. “Hell’ve em.”
bARNONE. Come to think of it, dancing and laughing on the beach. The spine of the ear would snap, the sludge or anybody’s heart.
[JON BON starts walking stage left shaking his head in contemplation.]
The REV. Where you off to? This is your party. Hey, who said “the baby glove of a pharaoh can be so presented as to bring tears to the eyes”?
JON BON (to The REV). Really, you should stop. You guys heard of Steve Orth, ‘from the caves of cocaine!,’ or something like that. I swear, fucking guy thinks he’s Bruce Springsteen.
bARNONE. That even in savage bosoms, allows us to connect it to a precise modality. Beard as a mask to disguise it for Christ’s sake!
The REV. Longfellow . . . right? typical.
bARNONE (to MAN in BLACK). What about movies?
MAN in BLACK (MIB). What about them? . . . I guess I liked Return To Oz . . .
JON BON (now interested, though still watching the game). Oh yeah...with that girl from that teenage witch movie, real cat-toothed, Sabrina something right?
MIB (flatly). Fairuza Balk.
bARNONE. Cat-teeth, twin sister of Apollo, methinks I stand on thorns till I begin, in other words, all that this earth can afford.
JON BON. Fairuza Balk.
bARNONE. When in Concord I held a café door open for a woman, she passed me, turning toward me, tensed up, looked at me as if I were American.
AELFRIC’S COLLOQUY (from backstage; this speech should be read simultaneously with JON BON’s on stage though in a slightly lower voice). For pony is griffin can me magi gone and past world for when mod Sefan mine new guess worse, pony is ear-lift eel gone pence, who his far-lice fleet often on, mode magi-Pegasus. Say piss miss-and-year eel ray dog-ray get him dressed and feel it; for pony no magi war-pony with where air hearse winter dale in world rice. With a seal Gepyldig, no seal no to hath car not to red-word, no to whack with a not to when-dig, no to fort not to fakin’ no to fee-fire, no nefarious Gepyldig to gone, air he gear Angel.
The SPORTSCASTER (in the middle of AELFRIC’s and JON BON’s speeches shouts loudly over both of them). Spiezio hits a home run!! Spiezio hits a home run!! An a-mazing turn of events! This is the meaning of Seventh Heaven ladies and gents! The Rally Monkey has spoken!
JON BON. You know, this all reminds me of someone. Jimmy Keys is just like Jimmy The Jeweler . . . you know . . . in Concord they got Eddie The Hat. We know all those guys. Spooky Steve, Tommy Thumbs. You know, Joey Keys. The cuteness of it is that he’s a little slow, and yet he was the bag man, or he was the guy who could pick a lock, or he was the guy that you thought was a moron. But it’s a fictional character. I was thinking of The Pope Of Greenwich Village, and we talked about the relationship between Mickey Rourke and Eric Roberts, and “Charlie, they got my thumb” you know . . . and guys like that are always in the romantic version. They’re gonna win! They’re gonna make it! And the Giants . . . the Giants are like Elton John on “Yellow Brick Road . . .”
MIB and The REV (together). In a bit hollow tears the beaker back, the tear in a shell comes out after the sun, and waking or ripping, the peal, the sun that feels its bundle wayward under sack.
bARNONE (should begin the line at “the sun that feels its bundle” in the line above). And burns what feet it finds cracking as stone and brine, and beginning to run after picking-up on the peal under that bike-trail weaving partly through the tracks.
MAN in BLACK and The REV (together; should begin the line at “and beginning to run after” in the line above). In the crab-apple some sour falling prickly stems mashed in the cracks of peal, or moths the salty wings and powder brings the red-light and bark-tree, or smoke reeling.
bARNONE (should begin the line at “powder brings the red-light” in the line above). About the wicker-webs and small window opened, or occurring in the full heel.
JON BON (to audience sung as a ballad). Buckner was a fine excuse
and through his legs went all
the Giants blew the chance to win
which way went the ball
[END.]
lost and FOUND
Oct 25, 2007
Oct 24, 2007
Oct 22, 2007
highlights of the weekend...
a weekend report in quotes
"how do you say 'bring it on' in French?"
"shuffle shuffle shuffle"
"what the fuck does 'a-historical' even mean?"
"hold on, let me Wiki it on my phone!"
"thud! (sound of Caitlin hitting logan in the arm)"
"feel my leg! feeeeel my LEG!!!"
"i think i'm going to make a fragrance today"
"can your car pop a wheelie?"
"she lives in an apartment that looks like a Gundam head"
"i thought the ghost of Jack Spicer was going to kill me"
"that outfit is pretentious"
"i'm just going to turn on some KMEL"
"gulpshslerleksshshs (sound of logan polishing off a bottle of red wine during his 30 minute reading)"
"veer sinister at the crest of the hill"
"are we at the 'crest' yet?"
"you should stop doing meth matthew, it makes you look old..."
"i'm about to get my swerve on"
"oh jesus! THAT guy?!"
"she's wearing my wrap...SHE'S WEARING MY WRAP!"
"they had a conversation about tina turner's bassist for 2 hours..."
"here let me scratch that"
"you have a lit cigarette in your hair"
"in greece we say 'it's all chinese to me'"
"they all look so...bronze"
"i'm a midget"
"no, you're not, you're just short"
"no...i'm a midget"
"okay"
"i don't think Har Ford is going to have much of a part in the movie"
"did you just call him "Har Ford?"
"they should have myspace top 3's"
"when i think of 'non-plussed' i think of a giant plus sign hovering next to me"
"i know him from the internet"
"plurals are the new abbrevs"
"i tried to stop the beer with my foot...but it kept growing"
"i hate poetry"
etc.
"how do you say 'bring it on' in French?"
"shuffle shuffle shuffle"
"what the fuck does 'a-historical' even mean?"
"hold on, let me Wiki it on my phone!"
"thud! (sound of Caitlin hitting logan in the arm)"
"feel my leg! feeeeel my LEG!!!"
"i think i'm going to make a fragrance today"
"can your car pop a wheelie?"
"she lives in an apartment that looks like a Gundam head"
"i thought the ghost of Jack Spicer was going to kill me"
"that outfit is pretentious"
"i'm just going to turn on some KMEL"
"gulpshslerleksshshs (sound of logan polishing off a bottle of red wine during his 30 minute reading)"
"veer sinister at the crest of the hill"
"are we at the 'crest' yet?"
"you should stop doing meth matthew, it makes you look old..."
"i'm about to get my swerve on"
"oh jesus! THAT guy?!"
"she's wearing my wrap...SHE'S WEARING MY WRAP!"
"they had a conversation about tina turner's bassist for 2 hours..."
"here let me scratch that"
"you have a lit cigarette in your hair"
"in greece we say 'it's all chinese to me'"
"they all look so...bronze"
"i'm a midget"
"no, you're not, you're just short"
"no...i'm a midget"
"okay"
"i don't think Har Ford is going to have much of a part in the movie"
"did you just call him "Har Ford?"
"they should have myspace top 3's"
"when i think of 'non-plussed' i think of a giant plus sign hovering next to me"
"i know him from the internet"
"plurals are the new abbrevs"
"i tried to stop the beer with my foot...but it kept growing"
"i hate poetry"
etc.
in other news
Brandon Brown is on a blogging rampage but is sort of apologizing for it by using "John Sakkis" as a foil...
i think Brandon Brown is out John Sakkis'ing
John Sakkis
i think Brandon Brown is out John Sakkis'ing
John Sakkis
Oct 19, 2007
...
this is the back of Bob Grenier's (can i call him "Bob?" it's not like we've met or anything, can i take the informal?) head from last night's David Bromige and Rae Armantrout's reading at the Unitarian Center (Hardball's Chris Matthews was doing a reading in the room next door!)...
...Bob was doing this sort of heckling thing while David was reading.
...Bob was doing this sort of heckling thing while David was reading.
Oct 18, 2007
...
today in my mouth i'm tasting root beer hard candy and McDonald's Fillet of Fish, my brain is fooling my tongue into thinking it's tasting that stuff
i'm feeling pretty synesthetic this morning
a man-boy fell madly in love with Caitlin last night not seeing me until i had to forcefully and manfully say "hello.!"
later on Caitlin told me that maybe she paid that guy to do that to test my manliness
i had a dream last night that i was on a gameshow with people from highschool, i had to come up with complimentary words, i remember shouting "chicken with white and wild rice" and "coffee and cigarettes" and "lemons and fish"
the other night at the International Poetry Festival after one of the international poets read my Theo Angelos leaned in and said "those goddamned northern Europeans and their Christian guilt!"
i watched this movie called Bug which i thought was a horror movie because it was marketed as a horror movie but it totally wasn't but rather an amazing flick all about paranoia and it all takes place in a hotel room and i loved it and think that the people who tried to market it as a horror movie are probably responsible for the fact that nobody really saw this movie that was direced by the guy who made The French Connection and The Exorcist
i'm reading Thomas Hobbes's The Leviathan right now and having a hard time with the English
yesterday my brother texted me "mimes. mimes annoy me more than anything"
a couple days ago my friend lauren texted me "i hope you're having fun in Moroco"
and before that my brother texted me "why is it so creepy when a praying mantis turns its head and looks at you"
i'm feeling pretty synesthetic this morning
a man-boy fell madly in love with Caitlin last night not seeing me until i had to forcefully and manfully say "hello.!"
later on Caitlin told me that maybe she paid that guy to do that to test my manliness
i had a dream last night that i was on a gameshow with people from highschool, i had to come up with complimentary words, i remember shouting "chicken with white and wild rice" and "coffee and cigarettes" and "lemons and fish"
the other night at the International Poetry Festival after one of the international poets read my Theo Angelos leaned in and said "those goddamned northern Europeans and their Christian guilt!"
i watched this movie called Bug which i thought was a horror movie because it was marketed as a horror movie but it totally wasn't but rather an amazing flick all about paranoia and it all takes place in a hotel room and i loved it and think that the people who tried to market it as a horror movie are probably responsible for the fact that nobody really saw this movie that was direced by the guy who made The French Connection and The Exorcist
i'm reading Thomas Hobbes's The Leviathan right now and having a hard time with the English
yesterday my brother texted me "mimes. mimes annoy me more than anything"
a couple days ago my friend lauren texted me "i hope you're having fun in Moroco"
and before that my brother texted me "why is it so creepy when a praying mantis turns its head and looks at you"
honestly, why is Facebook so popular?
"Dear victim, You have been bitten by Len! Click the 'Start Biting Chumps' button to become a Vampire and start biting other chumps! You can also fight other Zombies, Vampires & Werewolves now!"
why Baseball is the superior American sport...
"I told him to get going, like I would anyone," he said. "I love Manny. He's a great guy. But don't do that to us. Everyone knows he's a great player, but you don't have to show it. We don't have guys who do that."
Oct 17, 2007
oh no Demo, in LA!
from Joseph Mosconi
Please join us for a special backyard evening of poetry, food and conversation on Saturday, October 20, as we welcome poet and visual artist Demosthenes Agrafiotis, all the way from Athens, Greece.
Also reading will be local favorite Deborah Meadows.
Saturday, October 20
5pm
1305 Romulus Dr.
Glendale, CA
91205
Demosthenes Agrafiotis is an artist, poet, photographer, editor and sociologist based in Athens, Greece. Agrafiotis is the author of over 13 books of poetry, including a collaboration with Jerome Rothenberg, An Oracle for Delphi (Membrane Press, 1995). Between 1980 and 1990 he edited the Athens-based art & literary journal Clinamen, which featured translations of several influential American poets into Greek for the first time. His first book to appear in English, Chinese Notebook, is currently being translated by John and Angelos Sakkis.
Deborah Meadows teaches in the Liberal Studies department at California State Polytechnic University, Pomona. Her works of poetry include: involutia (Shearsman Press, UK, 2007), The Draped Universe (Belladonna* Books, 2007), Thin Gloves (Green Integer, 2006), Representing Absence (Green Integer, 2004), Itinerant Men (Krupskaya, 2004), and two chapbooks, Growing Still (Tinfish Press, 2005) and "The 60's and 70's: from The Theory of Subjectivity in Moby-Dick" (Tinfish Press, 2003). Her Electronic Poetry Center author page is located: http://epc.buffalo.edu/authors/meadows/
9x9 reminder
Logan Ryan Smith will be reading at my apartment Saturday Oct. 20th at 7pm as the San Francisco component of CA Conrad's 9x9 series.
come on over, he'll read, we'll drink, i'll play records.
bring beer and wine and whatever else though i'll provide some.
i know Del Cross is hosting Paolo Javier at his place the same night but you should feel free to attend *both* events, we'll be hanging out.
and honestly, two house readings in the Bay Area on the same night (!!!)...this needs to happen more often.
come on over, he'll read, we'll drink, i'll play records.
bring beer and wine and whatever else though i'll provide some.
i know Del Cross is hosting Paolo Javier at his place the same night but you should feel free to attend *both* events, we'll be hanging out.
and honestly, two house readings in the Bay Area on the same night (!!!)...this needs to happen more often.
Oct 16, 2007
The Paranoids
The Paranoids is the new poetics...
Logan knows what i'm talking about...
or,
this is what i was thinking about in Boulder...
or,
manifesto maybe to come sooner or later...
Logan knows what i'm talking about...
or,
this is what i was thinking about in Boulder...
or,
manifesto maybe to come sooner or later...
...
when people say "bring on the champagne!" but they pronounce it "cham pog na" does that make you angry, does that get under the skin?
when people say "ohh, hors de'ovres" but they pronounce it "horse overies" is that the same thing? do those people bother you much?
when people say "ohh, hors de'ovres" but they pronounce it "horse overies" is that the same thing? do those people bother you much?
Oct 15, 2007
...
Story (click on me please)
i bought a John Mckenzie the other night and carried it around the Mission for about 3 hours while Brandon and Alli and Matthew played with kinetic art at Jack Hanley (or that place next to Jack Hanley) listening to punk rock music on a Samsung stereo (not us, but the gallery) with tape decks (cause cassette's are the new vinyl or whatever) but it all seemed a little affected like the art student kids who were lounging around on the gallery floor eating Mexican food blocking direct access to the art hanging on the walls like it was the most natural thing in the world to be eating food on the gallery floor on opening night looking bored but "affected bored" like a lot of kids in the Mission look but we will be going back next time and i will probably try to buy another John Mckenzie to hang on my wall
i bought a John Mckenzie the other night and carried it around the Mission for about 3 hours while Brandon and Alli and Matthew played with kinetic art at Jack Hanley (or that place next to Jack Hanley) listening to punk rock music on a Samsung stereo (not us, but the gallery) with tape decks (cause cassette's are the new vinyl or whatever) but it all seemed a little affected like the art student kids who were lounging around on the gallery floor eating Mexican food blocking direct access to the art hanging on the walls like it was the most natural thing in the world to be eating food on the gallery floor on opening night looking bored but "affected bored" like a lot of kids in the Mission look but we will be going back next time and i will probably try to buy another John Mckenzie to hang on my wall
Oct 14, 2007
Oct 13, 2007
Oct 12, 2007
Oct 10, 2007
and then Friday
> > >>>>> Please come over and welcome Greek poet Demosthenes
Agrafiotis
> > >>>>> visiting from Athens
> >
> > Poet John Sakkis, his american translator, will read some of the
> > translations they've worked on together -- Agrafiotis will read the
> > greek
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> He's also giving 4 readings !!! while in the bay area so try
to
> > >>>>> catch him at The Poetry Center, The International Poetry
> Festival,
> > >>>>> U.C. Berkeley, or New Yipes
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Please feel free to forward this to anyone who might be
> interested
> > >>>>> -and/or to bring anyone along
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Friday October 12
> > >>>>> 5 - 7pm
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> 72 Carmel St
> > >>>>> SF 94117
> > >>>>> between Cole and Belvedre Streets
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> rsvp 415 731-5311
> > >>>>> or e-mail
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Hope to see you
> > >>>>> Susan & Steve
> > >>>>>
Agrafiotis
> > >>>>> visiting from Athens
> >
> > Poet John Sakkis, his american translator, will read some of the
> > translations they've worked on together -- Agrafiotis will read the
> > greek
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> He's also giving 4 readings !!! while in the bay area so try
to
> > >>>>> catch him at The Poetry Center, The International Poetry
> Festival,
> > >>>>> U.C. Berkeley, or New Yipes
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Please feel free to forward this to anyone who might be
> interested
> > >>>>> -and/or to bring anyone along
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Friday October 12
> > >>>>> 5 - 7pm
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> 72 Carmel St
> > >>>>> SF 94117
> > >>>>> between Cole and Belvedre Streets
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> rsvp 415 731-5311
> > >>>>> or e-mail
> > >>>>>
> > >>>>> Hope to see you
> > >>>>> Susan & Steve
> > >>>>>
Thursday 4pm San Francisco State University
i'll be reading with Demosthenes Agrafiotis at SFSU's The Poetry Center
DEMOSTHENES AGRAFIOTIS is active in the fields of poetry/painting/photography/intermedia and their interactions, with numerous books of poetry and essays and exhibitions of visual art both in Greece and abroad. His anthology-formatted magazine 'Clinamen' (1980-90), co-published by Erato Publications in Athens (1991-94), has been active for over a decade as an amalgam of Greek poetry and art with work from Europe and America. 7 artists books were published based on 'Clinamen' (1980-1995). Since 1996 'Clinamen' has continued production of artists books (18), with a web version ( http://www.thetis.gr/services/clinamen) launched in 2001. He is also a professor of Sociology at the National School of Public Health in Athens, Greece, with many published writings on art and epidemiology. In 2004 his performance "A-Empedocles" was staged in the volcanic crater of Sicily's Mt. Aetna.
The Poetry Center, SFSU
1600 Holloway Avenue
San Francisco CA 94132
Oct 9, 2007
Oct 8, 2007
...
him weirdo not you. he said something and then you said "your mom" and then he tackled you...weirdo. and then i broke it up and he fed me Turkish food and we watched Quadrophenia till 4am.
yeah, very successful day/night.
where'd emma go? let's not almost fight people in green shirts who fall over anymore. how'd we leave dutchface's party? was i being mean to Becca's boyfriend? was i skipping hella hard on the way home from molotov's with my arm around your neck? i remember skipping so hard it felt like i was floating, but maybe that was a dream? i know i was holding hands with Becky but i also think i was levitating up Pierce. and some new semi-okay show at Edo but the san gria was nasty-good, but i keep getting friday confused with saturday. i felt like we went to my house and i turned around and there was 15 people standing in my hallway. did that happen? did someone go "heeey!" when they saw the nate vandyke on the wall? what the hell does butt pudding mean? seriously, i remember laughing but how come? "square-head" i get. with spaghetti in his mouth and stuck to his forehead all "who you callin' square-head" and me saying "not you dude...my friend caty..." and him flinging his face around and all the noodles flopping all over his beard. but butt pudding? talking to those people with herpes all over their faces and clothes but then they just came from the blood wrestling thing at The Top, but that was friday right? or Dj'ing all day at D-Structure with hungover Sylvia constantly folding stuff. and alamo square for a second looking at italian tourist-girls leap into the air in front of the Full House houses trying to get that perfect "i'm leaping in a park in San Francisco" photo, and failing. i remember breaking my beer and then kicking some girl's cell phone out of her hand while trying to finish a text message and sweep you off your legs. something about pizza. something about Pankration and vestiments in the LH. something about that Bjork girl who texted Emma all "your boyfriend's brother is hot" or something and how that made me feel good but also turn around and threaten Armand. something about you guys eating all this pizza. but it was hawaiian for some reason? did we talk shit to some people next to the pizza shop? and we were saying how much we like old metallica in bars with wu-tang's 36 chambers playing. why did we walk to webster to get pizza? some kind of new bar next to the pizza shop full of men in fadoras? yeah? and you drank bloody mary's in the afternoon before all of this for the first time. oh god i watched law & order ci all day yesterday seeing spiders on the wall.
yeah, very successful day/night.
where'd emma go? let's not almost fight people in green shirts who fall over anymore. how'd we leave dutchface's party? was i being mean to Becca's boyfriend? was i skipping hella hard on the way home from molotov's with my arm around your neck? i remember skipping so hard it felt like i was floating, but maybe that was a dream? i know i was holding hands with Becky but i also think i was levitating up Pierce. and some new semi-okay show at Edo but the san gria was nasty-good, but i keep getting friday confused with saturday. i felt like we went to my house and i turned around and there was 15 people standing in my hallway. did that happen? did someone go "heeey!" when they saw the nate vandyke on the wall? what the hell does butt pudding mean? seriously, i remember laughing but how come? "square-head" i get. with spaghetti in his mouth and stuck to his forehead all "who you callin' square-head" and me saying "not you dude...my friend caty..." and him flinging his face around and all the noodles flopping all over his beard. but butt pudding? talking to those people with herpes all over their faces and clothes but then they just came from the blood wrestling thing at The Top, but that was friday right? or Dj'ing all day at D-Structure with hungover Sylvia constantly folding stuff. and alamo square for a second looking at italian tourist-girls leap into the air in front of the Full House houses trying to get that perfect "i'm leaping in a park in San Francisco" photo, and failing. i remember breaking my beer and then kicking some girl's cell phone out of her hand while trying to finish a text message and sweep you off your legs. something about pizza. something about Pankration and vestiments in the LH. something about that Bjork girl who texted Emma all "your boyfriend's brother is hot" or something and how that made me feel good but also turn around and threaten Armand. something about you guys eating all this pizza. but it was hawaiian for some reason? did we talk shit to some people next to the pizza shop? and we were saying how much we like old metallica in bars with wu-tang's 36 chambers playing. why did we walk to webster to get pizza? some kind of new bar next to the pizza shop full of men in fadoras? yeah? and you drank bloody mary's in the afternoon before all of this for the first time. oh god i watched law & order ci all day yesterday seeing spiders on the wall.
Oct 6, 2007
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