Jul 31, 2007

...

my brother's girlfriend Emma
wins for this dating tip txt message...

"
First you should buy her a flower. not a bouquet, just a single flower. And say something like such a beautiful girl deserves a pretty flower. Make sure

its a flower she can tuck behind he ear so she can wear it on the date and feel sexy and special. Look up online the Seaward slides, maybe you guys can

go on a nice, romantic night, walk there, maybe some hand holding. and a kiss. then go for a night cap at the Noc Noc and lay down on some pillows and dri

ink some hot sake in the dark, maybe canoodling. I like sake because you kinda get a nice buzz but no hangover in the morning."

haha! thanks Emma...but no, i won't do any of this stuff...either way it's a lose/lose for me...Emma and "THE GIRL" work together at the same hair salon...gossips like whoa...i'm screwed...

...

hmmm...going on a date tonight, trying to figure out what we should do...what should we do?

mind you it's a school night for the both of us (so to speak) so nothing too crazy...dinner and drinks sounds so fucking blah...i'm usually good with dates but for some reason i'm drawing blank...i don't know, probably getting out of the neighborhood is a good idea...maybe a show? i hate dinner and drinks...i don't really do dinner and drinks...and then i can't talk to her at a show...and we don't really know each other so the talking thing is going to be important tonight...so maybe not a show...

help me out!

Jul 30, 2007

Jul 28, 2007

Jul 27, 2007

Alex Broskow

tonight!



...

Kevin on Art Basel 38

Jul 26, 2007

my very first Farsi rap

my rap name is CONSTANTINE THE PAGAN

CONSTANTINE THE PAGAN

this is a rap to the key of ICE CUBE circa 92'...

Namak ruye zkhmesh nariz!
NARIZ!!!
Namak ruye zkhmesh nariz!
NARIZ! IZ IZ!!!

comin' from COCO County
COCO COUNTY!!!
COCO CONSTANTINE THE PAGAN
COCO CONSTANTINE THE PAGAN!!!

MOOSELINI Beh reesh-e pedaresh khandid
sappin' OE like john candy
goin' dumb like hella
Dast ruye dastesh gozashteh
but i disagree
Zir dast-e man karmikard
steady workin' on the the podcast
PODCAST
about to go live
shit was hard knocks
Dast beh dahan mandam!!!

i'm teaching myself Farsi...

where were you last night man?

Sayeh shoma sangine shoudeh...

lauren rocked Adobe but Kheili dochtar-e khonaki ast, if you know what i mean...

but for real, you should probably call to apologize or somethin', Namak ruye zkhmesh nariz, feel me?

after the reading Dast beh dahan mandam, and i think most of the crowd was too...

and then this dude spills his fucking vodka tonic on my shirt and i'm all "Dast az sare kachalam bardar!!! motherfucker!!!"

and he's all "Sar beh saram nagozar, dickhead!!!"

and i sock him in the face and sort of snarl "Jigar-e toe bikhoram" but in a sarcastic way, you know...?

...

Chris Berman makes my ear drums gush blood...

Jul 25, 2007

LRS wins a The San Francisco Bay Guardian "Best Of The Bay" award for "Best Heir To Ferlinghetti"

"These days, anyone with a personal computer and a pipe dream fancies him- or herself a writer. So much so that if you have an interest in separating the extraordinary from the mediocre, you're faced with a choice: spend the rest of your days sifting through piles of self-published and often self-aggrandizing dribble, hoping to find the next Allen Ginsberg (although we can only imagine his blog) - or let Logan Ryan Smith do the dirty work for you. The San Francisco writer was the publisher of Small Town Press, an irreverent, eclectic, and daring vehicle for the disembodied poets of our time. And though Smith recently pulled the plug on the Small Town operation, he's using his penchant for finding the best underrepresented writing talents around in the service of a new chapbook series, Transmission Press. Carrying the torch of dissident publishers from San Francisco's literary heyday, Smith understands the worth of the word and is working like crazy to make exceptional literature accessible.

www.transmissionpress.blogspot.com"

WOOTER GO LOGAN!!!

GO TRANSMISSION!!!

GO ME FOR HAVING AN UPCOMING TRANSMISSION CHAPBOOK WHICH BY DEFAULT MAKES ME A BEST OF THE BAY WINNER TOO!!!

they took the video away...

...i'm sad...

"raise your kids/ raise your kids/ raise your godamned kids!"

Jul 24, 2007

i <3 firecrotch...


Lindsay, say it isn't so!!! you're like the bastard love-great great-grand child of Fatty Arbuckle

"We didn't start the fire
It was always burning
Since the world's been turning
We didn't start the fire
No we didn't light it
But we tried to fight it"

Jul 23, 2007

Lauren Kohne's BUS



Stepdown Magazine

"Come to the opening debut for stepdown magazine; a continuous collection of bus-happenings expressed through stories and comics that capture the bizarre, unadulterated, beautiful, nasty world or "essence", of riding public transportation. TRUST ME - THIS IS NOT YOUR AVERAGE BOOK READING - it will be so much more."



Venue - Adobe Books
Address- 3166 16th St. SF, CA. 94103 (on 16th between Valencia and Guerrero)
Date - July 25th (Wednesday)
Time - 8:30pm
Cost - No Cost

Jul 22, 2007

everyone should get a faux-girlfriend!

i just wanted to say that Becky is the best faux-girlfriend (say: pho-ga) a boy could ask for...

so, "Gone Campin'!" was a total bust...i drove up there with my sister and hung out for approx. 4 hours, drank a couple beers, ate some BBQ'd chicken and then stole my sister's car and fled back to the city...i SUCK SUCK SUCK at camping...the way Ward Churchill feels about taking off his baseball cap for the National Anthem is how i feel about camping...i stayed long enough to get a photo of Ozan and Brittany, and the backs of some of the campers as they eat food...awesome...



so i had a nice drive back to the city from the North Bay listening to Madonna's Ray Of Light...called up Beckers, picked her up in the TL, headed back to the Lower Haight, got sandwiches, went to Molotov's, got scared of the crankster boy pacing around the bar with the two tear drop tattoo's under his eyes harrassing people for cigarettes...left Molotov's, and walked over to Madrone for the Prince Vs. Michael Jackson dance party (PVMJDPD)...the PVMJDPD was like a Bachelorette party from the 6th circle of hell (if the 6th circle of hell was populated by spray on tan girls in too-short summer dresses with spinich dip stuck between their teeth coupled with tan-cock men with wrinkly sun-burnt chests with way way coifed leave-in-conditioned Don Johnson hair...if it was like that), the hightlight def. being when this guy strapped a giant plastic Duracell battery to his chest and performed a choreographed "break dance" routine for the next 15 mintues (awesomely painful video forthcoming!)...

grabbed a cab to the TL, went to see matthew at the Castle...but there was this going on
and they were testing the mics and it was loud so we left. blah blah Whiskey Thieves then the Hemlock blah blah...back to the Castle for the show...watched that, ran into a bunch of drama...put my foot in my mouth when i called this girl by the wrong name (there's a story there, but not on this blog i guess)...blah blah...

Beck and i leave...

my favorte parts of the day were when random men, in passing us on the street, would remark to me about Becky...stuff like, "you gots a FYIIINE looing lady right thur..." or, "yo man, you better take care of her..." or "what'chu got that i don't got?!"...stuff like that kicked ass for real.



blah, i'm not going to shower today and i'm going to eat a lot of quiche and watch three movies...

RIP Pete Wilson

Jul 21, 2007

gone campin'!

like right now...my sister
is about to pick me up...woot! can't wait to get out of the city for the night...

last night was fun...spun a hip hop set at D-StructureNevine's last day and stuff...then went over to Molotov's to meet up with big-emma


and roxy


from Edo...drank a bunch of "stupid" beers with the gals...headed WAY out to Three Parkside for a fun fun punk show
...drank a ton of "stupid" beers and sort of jumped up and down with all the cute punk kids (and by "kids" i mean punk's in their 30's, and by "cute" i mean gnarly as fuck)...had a nice talk with bigemma about socking fools up...

i went to bed and dreamt all about a big party at Jon Julio's house
...i was supposed to DJ but Azikiwee Anderson
paid Sean Aston $20 to jump me...which he did, breaking all my records...but later on i was walking with a big pack of kids, and we see Sean Aston, and we're sort of in LA or Long Beach or something, and i'm like "holy shit, that's Sean Aston...GET HIM!!!"...and we do, and sort of beat the crap out of Sean Aston, and it's ver. sunny out, and there's lot's of green lawn everywhere, and me and all my friends are all standing over Sean Aston laughing...

Jul 20, 2007

Joel Bettridge you're my hero

It is hard to describe to people who grew up with a more leftist perspective, but for me, the insight that Language writing, and subsequently the broader innovative tradition, provided was life altering. Looking back on this experience I would say that I think poetry can put people in a position to live differently--challenge their familiar modes of thinking, ask them to believe in new ways and develop new cultural, political, or philosophical concerns. In that way I think poetry can create change. I don't expect, or even want, a poem to operate in the world in the way a vote or a bullet does; I don't think that is what poems are for. I do not share the worry, which appears to be on the rise, that poetry is not directly political enough. Poetry, for me, has been and continues to be a means of navigating my environment--it is one of the ways of thinking that allows me to act in the world deliberately, and, I hope, with more insight and care. I never actually feel outside of poetry; as a way to make sense of my experience I can't think about poetry (or a single poem) as a tool, or as something apart from me, something I use to execute or demonstrate my politics. I might use poems to figure out my politics, among other concerns, but I don't substitute them for political actions.

Free Genarlow Wilson!!!


i've been following this story for a while now and i still can't get my head around it...i mean, what the hell? honestly...what the hell?! how the fuck was this 17 year old boy EVER sentenced to 10yrs for getting a consensual blowjob from a 15 year old girl (and there's no doubt about that, the girl came out and said it was consensual and that she initiated the whole thing)...what.the.freaking.hell? it's like Taliban, Georgia or something (The Peaches and Honor Killing State!)...this story really messes with my head...blegh...

...

did the earthquake last night wake you guys up too? that totally wasn't a small one...

Jul 19, 2007

...




...






Jul 18, 2007

San Francisco Public Transportation

MTV

i was car-

jacked and pistol-
whipped after

they Pimped

My Ride

...

L. Moriarty VS Bhanu K.

Jul 16, 2007

MTV

DMX

got the Hip Hop Generation

into Motorsports

oh hell yes! i just bought two tickets!

i'm going to Costa Rica with Brett...sometime.



"only in my dreams/ as real as it may seem/ it was only in my dreams"
--D. Gibson

Jul 14, 2007

i'm feeling a little like this today

...

sales for Tintin in the Congo sore after racism row

this is awesome. cause yeah, like Herge is a total racist...get the uf' out of there with that stuff.

Jul 13, 2007

way to go Iraqi Parliament!

"My understanding is at this juncture they're going to take August off, but, you know, they may change their minds," White House press secretary Tony Snow said.

"You know, it's 130 degrees in Baghdad in August," he said, sympathetically.

Snow was reminded that U.S. troops will be continuing to fight throughout August in the heat."

i'm feeling a little bit like this this morning...

Jul 12, 2007

(muffins) IN A STATE issue 11 Logan Ryan Smith Detumescence pamphlet series

a robotic megaphoned voice outside says, "Dada,/ Dada, Dada,"/ and it's because of you people/ that I can no longer think/ it's a child/ calling for its father

C-Town Nomenclature or, "Istambul to Constantinople to Istanbul"




my homie Apollo, one of the comment box lurkers over at Claycord did some research for me...

..."ok, so spent some time at Concord Historical Society, old woman's club early this week to do some volunteering, scanning pics of some boring footbal game in the late 1960's. I dropped that a "friend" of mine was seeking to rename concord to its original name. I think you read my post. . . well here's the back up

"In 1869 Salvio Pacheco, Fernando Pacheco, and Francisco Galino laid out the town of Concord, plotting lots and streets. The donor of the lan suggested the name Todos Santos (All Saints). Tis is the name by which the town was recorded. The Americans dubbed it Drunken Indian, but the public finally gave it the name it now bears" History of Contra Costa County; Historic Record Co., Los Angeles 1926



"In the naming of the new town there was a variety of disputation. At first the Spanish population and donors of the land wanted it to be named Todos Santos (All Saints), by which the name was recorded. The Americans had dubbed it Drunken Indian, with that genius that the early pioneers displayed for the science of nomenclature. But it was finally left to the public to give it the name of Concord, by which it is officially known" - The history of Contra Costa County, p. 110, , edited by F.J. Hulaski Berkeley 1917



"In the naming of the new town, there was much variety of disputation. To bgin with, the spanish ppulation and the donors of the land wanted it to be named Todos Santos (All Saint) by which name it is recorded; The Americans had dubbed it Drunken Indian; but it was left for the Contra Costa Gazette to give it the name of Concord, by which it is now known, habitually if not officially" History of Contra Costa County , W. A. Slocum 1882



"The Spanish people in the town called it Todos Santos (All Saints), but the Americans called it Drunken Indian. The Contra Costa Gazette wrote of it as Concord and the name stuc" Wilma Cheatham, The Story of Contra Costa County for Boys and Girls , 1942



"The name of the new town was officially recorded as Todos Santos, All Saints

Not long after the Americans began to settle in Todos Santos, they found an Indian living nearby who, being addicted to fire water, resorted to many wiley schemes to obtain free drinks. Anglo Saxon settlers finding more or less difficulty in mastering the combination of hard consanants and soft rolling vowels of Spanish Todos Santos, decided to call the new town "Drunken Indian" and for a time it appeared as though the name would stick. The aristocratic Pachecos were all but overcome with consternation.

Better judgement prevailed and it appeared before long that a name with more dignity than was expressed by Drunken Indian would have to be adopted. The credit for the name of Concord, some authorities claim, belongs to the editor of the pioneer newspaper, the Contra Costa Gazette" Purcell, History of Contra Costa County, Berkelely 1940, p 707,8



Oakland Tribune Aug 11, 1976 p. 14 "But anglos found the phrase (Todos Santos) a tongue twister and dubbed the town 'Drunken Indian'"



Now, I do not know how much of this material is self referential, as to how many of these quotes are strictly refering to the same source. But I still believe in Drunken Indian, it's in my heart, if not in my stomach and liver.

Jul 9, 2007


Jennifer "Rogers" Koshkina ("I predict that in the future saying "Jennifer Rogers" will be like calling Amiri "Leroi Jones." Older people will think it natural while younger people will kinda cringe and wonder, "is he okay with that?" M. Koshkin) from Livestock Editions

8 randoms meme

i have a gigantic bladder. when i'm drinknig (esp. of late) i like to talk about how huge my bladder is...you might hear me say something like "my bladder is my entire midriff...how big is *your* bladder?" if you are a male and you're hanging out with me (esp. of late) i might make fun of how small your bladder is compared to mine.

i sing when i'm on the toilet. i make up songs when i'm on the toilet. sometimes i'm sitting on the toilet for an hour because i'm having so much fun making up and singing songs that i don't want to get up. as soon as i leave the bathroom i stop singing songs and start talking to myself. some lyrics to a song i wrote recently on the toilet: "if you want to see a nice set of bladder/ look no further than me/ if you want to see a nice pair of hair/ look no further than my brother/ if you want to see a nice hand of clothes/ look no further than my sister" etc.

another song that i like to sing is sort of a free form list poem song that sounds something like: "next time you're in new haven/ and you're looking for a gift/ open up your wallet/ and bring me some of this.../ bring me paper towels and coffee/ and dish soap and toffee/ bring me caramels and clorox/ dental floss and moving box/ comic books and tv's/ bring me chicken wings it's easy!/ when you're walking down the street/ and you smell something neat/ think of me/ think of me/ when you're dreaming in your bed/ birds flying 'round your head/ fall in love with me/ fall in love with me/ when you're drinking whiskey drinks/ at the bar with girly winks/ think of spinning tops and gum ball drops and ice cream too and spittin' chew and baseball diamond, windchime chimmin'.../ think of me/ think of me..."

i've almost been shot three times:

1. on Hegenburger Rd. in Oakland. i had a glock 9 put in my stomach.

2. near Point Molate in Richmond. this time we were just sort of threatened. no gun was actually pulled. but he wanted to shoot us. his gun was tucked into his belt. we had to speed off in a car very fast.

3. on Fulton and Masonic in SF (my old neighborhood). i went to grab some Sun Chips at the corner store. a show just got out at Storyville. a fight broke out. i watch the fight. dude pulls out a gun and starts shooting into the crowd (shooting sideways no less). the car i'm standing behind takes 3 bullets. i sort of dive down because most of the bullets are hitting near me. a Caddy pulls up. dude shooting jumps in the car and they speed off.

i used to be a very big guy. i used to weigh 260lbs. now i weigh 190. i used to wear a size 42 pant. now i wear a 33 or 34. i lost all the weight in maybe 6 or 7 months.

i'm most attracted to girl's with "strong" faces. i.e., bridged noses...i think Sofia Coppola is amazing to look at. i've realized that telling a girl that they look like Sofia Coppola can be taken as either a compliment or an insult. also, i'm attracted to women in their 40's.

my friend Billy works in Hollywood. he has to deal with celebrities all day. he hates celebrities. he says that everyone in Hollywood (the business) hates celebrities. he says that Jessica Alba is the only celebrity he's met that is even more beautiful in person than on film. he says that most other celebrities are pretty budget. like, he says that Jessica Simpson is pretty budget. i've never really understood the Jessica Alba thing. she's mousey. she doesn't have a "strong" face. but maybe if i met her in person i would change my mind.

and i was Jello Biafra's merch guy. and all the cute little punk rock kids would look at me like i was best friends with Jello. and all the cute little punk rock kids's moms would look at me like "don't you dare sell that Alternative Tentacle BUSH=NAZI t-shirt to my little boy..."

i'm a very patriotic person. i think that being patriotic has very little to do with politics. i think that poetry, skateboarding and hip hop are all very patriotic things.

Jul 6, 2007

BOTH BOTH the Myspace wants to be friends with you!


so please add him by going here...


http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=210498976

Jul 5, 2007

I Spit On Your Grave


"A vile bag of garbage named "I Spit on Your Grave" is playing in Chicago theaters this week. It is a movie so sick, reprehensible and contemptible that I can hardly believe it's playing in respectable theaters, such as Plitt's United Artists. But it is. Attending it was one of the most depressing experiences of, my life...This movie is an expression of the most diseased and perverted darker human natures, Because it is made artlessly, It flaunts its motives: There is no reason to see this movie except to be entertained by the sight of sadism and suffering. As a critic, I have never condemned the use of violence in films if I felt the filmmakers had an artistic reason for employing it. "I Spit on Your Grave" does not. It is a geek show. I wonder if its exhibitors saw it before they decided to play it, and if they felt as unclean afterward as I did."

—Roger Ebert

i just watched this...it wasn't ALL that bad, but yeah, mostly...

...

for all the post-4th workers at work right now i feel your pain and salute you.

Jul 3, 2007

Happy Independence Day!

today we will BBQ hop around SF...

Jul 2, 2007

...

had a very nice weekend:

i got a DJ gig at D-Structure, so come visit me on Fridays.

Jason E. opening was good. saw electro-morphine-Peter. he's off the morphine which is good. we talked about Egyptian Lover and the South Bay.

talked about Maritime Hall (rip) and Carl at the Ha Ra with Julio.

went to the TL and got goofy with Beck. met H. Lewis who is *not* friends with Katie-coup-de-twat. though H. Lewis will be drawing on me sooner than most other people, thanks Beck.

got mexican food and ate it. saw Matthew-dawg. met up with some annoying yatches. talked about the East Bay. ditched annoying yatches. met nice girls from East County. talked about Port Costa and the traintracks and the C&H factory in Crockett.

sunday, waited 45 min for N train (hungover). N train broke down at Church. got off and got on another N Train. got to EMB BART, waited 20 minutes for Pittsburg/ Baypoint train. around Lafayette, third rail goes haywire. BART creeps along to Walnut Creek. i txt friends "i fucking hate public transportation in the Bay Area" rather than punch the seat. finally get to Concord. my mom shows me the new jeans she bought me. i try them on in the kitchen. they fit. brother and i skate around the cul de sac. my mom shows me the suitcase full of 1950's comics she brought back from Las Crusas NM. dig through comics like a little kid. get all sneezy and smiley. eat an amazing make-up-Father's-Day-dinner: spanikopita, greek salad, meat filled dolmathes, garlic bread, smashed potatos, skorthalya, BBQ'd salmon, BBQ strip steak marinated in chipoltle, brocolinni. strawberries and fat green grapes for desert.

moved all my records and turntables to SF. moved the rest of my books to SF. now i have my Prose bookshelf and my Poetry bookshelf.

watched the season finale of Flavor of Love/ Charm School. was very glad Safairi won. though i didn't like what they did with her hair. they made her look like a busted-ass Foxy Brown. i like her original strawberry sherbert weave.

went to bed and had a dream where Brandon B. said that me and Armand were cool. and that he'd like to have dinner with us very soon.

...

Kerouac Festival at Naropa